For the rights to free write/ramblings at work/its been a long day/soundcloud playlist: Smoke_mirrors.


Drew Anthuny sings two octaves low enough to puncture all my feelings in the gut. The beat is as slow as vino dripping off a crystal glass. The beat is what all hearts aspires to be. I am listening to one song on repeat. I am reflecting on repeat. Tropical Storm heading northeast. 12th one this season. Going back to Cali in a few weeks. Organizing festival in november. Coordinating Intergenerational Coming out Stories event this weekend. Check in with seven high schools around the island. 12 hour work days. Mail poetry books to horizons I may never see. This life is a storm I don't mind getting lost in. Man, I want to go back to therapy. The present is a beast. I am loving myself beauty. Where am i going with this free write? Rule number 1 of pacific tongues workshop: Be in the moment. Write down whatever is in your head. There is a cacophony of clutter in my mind. All I have been able to write about lately is blue, rivers, the sea. Bodies of water, bodies, water, me. Shades of love I am continuously learning to allow, to explore, to be open with. I bought a ticket to California. Funny. I just went to California a few months back. Told myself I wouldn't go back for another two years. Then Universe teaches lessons. Never make plans, never say never. When you ask for something, be specific. When you think you got it figured out. Think again. The punchline is in the unexpected. The punchline is in the poetry. Its always been the poetry. What are we poets but the illustrator of jokes. and yet. Hafiz once wrote, "Even After All this time, The Sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens With a love like that, it lights the whole sky."

Jocelyn NgComment